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The 'R' Word

  

The 'R' Word


Sorry, but part and parcel of what we said a few lines ago is that it will happen at some point - you will be rejected.

Learn to deal with it right now, because it will, it must, happen. It happens in the real world of singles bars and dance halls, so why should the online dating scene be any different? Indeed, it may happen more than once, and maybe there will be times when you just feel like throwing in the towel, and quitting. Before you do so, think of everything that you stand to gain when you do make it work (and, keep going and it will happen) and everything that you will lose if you quit now.

In general, be as philosophical as you can about rejection, and realize that it probably means little more than the fact that you did not have enough in common with that other person in the first place. Thus, if you hadn't been rejected today, then it was definitely going to happen at some day, so it is a good thing to get it over and done with, out of the way, now.

Also, remember that 'No Drama Online Dating' is designed to maximize your chances of success in online dating. If you choose to ignore the recommendations in this book, doing things your own way, then that will certainly not help you either! So, when the big 'R' hit's you like a bullet between the eyes, go back and to make sure that you have done what I have told you to do. Maybe there's something that you missed? Is your profile as interesting and appealing as it should be?

Does your profile contain enough information that would interest others? Does it show you as a happy and optimistic person, or did you create it on a day when things were not going so great? Are you holding up the conversation on your end? Are you being pro-active and incisive enough? Did you try to push it on to the next step, and did you time your 'push' correctly?

If things are not working out quite right, and you're not sure whether you are doing something wrong, here's a little 'experiment' that you might want to try, to dig a little deeper into the problems. Grab a bottle of wine, and invite an old and close friend over to your place. Ask then to take a read through your profile, and tell them to be honest with you about their thoughts.

Ask them how accurate is it?
Is it honest?
Does it show you at your best?
Do you come over as interesting and cheerful?
Are they drawn in to it?
What, if anything would they add to it, or remove In other words, get someone who wants to be helpful, but who nevertheless knows you for who you really are, to give you an honest assessment of what you believe is an honest personal assessment of you!

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